When entering the fancy glass doors into a “Health and Beauty Clinic” in Chiang Mai, we were welcomed with a glass of ice cold water and asked to sit down and discuss the treatment – with your eating habits, it’s safe to say that your body needs regular maintenance through detox cleanses.
It really was an absurd situation, to be talking with two young, good looking women about bowel massage and… poop. Yes – we were both having a colon cleanse.
The reasons to have a colon cleanse are many, like skin beauty, cancer prevention, longevity etc. However, for us there was one reason that made us really want to do it (prepare for some gross facts):
The average person has between 4 to 25 pounds of built-up intestinal matter in their colon…
The amount of built up “crap” depends a lot on your eating habits.
Back to the reception. It was absurd simply because you just don’t discuss your bowel movements and habits with others – EVER! It’s embarrassing and disturbing.
But I had to get over myself and remind myself that these two well dressed petite thai women do this every day – it’s their job to empty people’s… bowels.
The women weren’t embarrassed at all, but talked about everything as though it was nothing more sensitive than a facial treatment.
Although I’m not sure how used they were to having a 6 foot 3 tall guy (Nathan) coming there!
A few minutes later, the two of us were put into different rooms (something I was very thankful for later on!), and given a set of sandals, a towel, and a silk robe.
As I entered the room there was a huge spaceship-seat-looking thing with a big tank in front filled with 25 liters of water.
I was left alone, and had no idea what to do. Did they expect me to do it all myself and know how to get this spaceship going?
I started getting nervous: what had I got myself into?!
How could this tank of 25 liters of water possibly be able to fit inside MY body?
What were those two see-through pipes running along the sides, and that huge leaver next to the seat?!
As I tried to climb on top of the thing, one of the women finally entered the door.
This is when things got a little awkward… She helped me with all the..uhm..arrangements, and told me to start pulling the “gear”.
The tropical climate in Thailand is perfect for these beautiful Frangipani flowers, and you see them all over the country.
It was a very strange feeling, and being told to “push out” in front of a stranger was a thought that I had to fight to get over.
I have never before been into such a crazy situation, having someone carefully observing what comes through the pipes running along the machine.
Then, after a minute or so, she said “Oh, I see you’re a vegetarian!”…Huh?
She continued asking me questions, talk about my health and eating habits, things I thought nobody else could know unless you followed me 24/7 – she could see it all by just looking inside that see-through pipe, and knew my body better than myself!
I was left alone with a magazine, as though they thought you could relax and read anything when your whole world was been pushed upside down.
The following hour was one of the strangest experiences, but it also changed everything for the better for months afterwards.
In the West, colon cleanse is still something rather new, and old-fashioned doctors claim that the body should take care of it without help – however the truth is that it doesn’t.
Researches have shown that 90% of the western world’s population’s colon is completely messed up and doesn’t look anything in the way it does when we’re born, this because of our eating habits.
It’s not the normal spoil-yourself gift for the start of a new year, but if you want to get healthier instantly, Thailand is a cheap place to do it. Medical Tourism in Thailand is a huge business.
Other than health treatments, Thailand is full of medical beauty touch ups too, like dentists… I can’t help but to consider trying that too… 😉
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(Photo credit: happymealy)