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(Weekly Travel Question) – How Would Your Travels Have Changed If You Were Single?

Posted by on June 3, 2010 .

This week we received a question from Annie Leroux.

Here is her question:

“How would your travel plans have changed if you didn’t have each other? I am often wondering how couples who do long-term RTW travel find each other and if the plans sparked FROM finding each other or if the two were traveling separately and combined plans.” – Annie

Hi Annie, thanks for your question, I thought answering to your question would be easy, but the more I think the harder it gets!

How It Hasn’t Changed…

My plan to make a long-term trip somewhere was there long before I met Nathan. I told everyone that nobody would get in my way, that I would travel the world no matter what.

When I met Nathan he was on his last year to graduate a masters degree in classical music, but soon after he decided to quit. He wanted something more out of life, and so did I. The more we hung out, the more similar our dreams became. I guess we shaped each other in a way. I wanted to travel, he wanted to do something different after having spent so many years studying, and travel around the world again seemed like a great option for him.

I believe that a big reason why me and Nathan got together was because we wanted the same things in life. If you’re looking for the same things in life, you will naturally want to go to the same places to get them.

Depending on your personality, you want to see, do and experience different things. A couple traveling together looking for two opposite things won’t stick together very long. If one person wants to do all the crazy adventurous things and party hard, and the other is more interested in a slow, comfortable trip, it simply will not work.

Another reason I think might have had some impact was that I attracted what I wanted: I was dreaming of surfing in the South Pacific, and here comes Nathan – a surfer from New Zealand… ;)

How It HAS Changed…

Despite the fact that I might have traveled alone to the same countries which we traveled to together, my travel plans have changed so radically with Nathan that the trips in themselves would have looked so different in a way that I can only imagine.

First of all there are so many places in these countries I know I wouldn’t have traveled to, not because I didn’t want to but because I didn’t know how to!

With Nathan I get that extra bit of courage, I dare to try more things and be even more adventurous. With Nathan I dare taking more chances than I probably would by myself.

I think the planning route would have looked slightly different in that way that I would have stayed closer to the ‘beaten track’, but when he was there next to me I didn’t need that comfort and safety.

There is no place I wouldn’t want to go to, but some I’d like to see more than others. With Nathan though, I do have to compromise. Some of the places we’ve gone to wouldn’t have been my first choice, but that’s part of the beauty. With him I travel to places I otherwise wouldn’t ever go to.

Now I’d like to forward the question to you – our readers. How would your trips have changed if you didn’t have your travel buddy/partner, or more so (for solo travelers), if you DID have one…?

Also if you have any travel questions you would like us to answer in the next few weeks – send us an email here: aswetravel(at)gmail.com

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  • Annie Leroux

    Thanks so much for answering my question. It is really inspiring to find couples who both feel so passionate about traveling that they are able to do it together. Extra points for maintaining a fantastic travel blog together. I currently have a solo RTW trip in the beginning stages of being planned. I hope to be lucky enough to find someone as passionate and adventurous as I am to continue traveling with throughout my life. You two are lucky!

    Love your blog.

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  • http://www.facebook.com/nathanschacherer Nathan Schacherer

    Hey Annie, thank you so much for the lovely comments – glad you enjoy our blog :) yeah I'm sure you will find the right someone to travel with – I think one of the best things is to never rely on others – I never planned to stay and travel with Sofia – but we just grow together over time, maybe because we never planned or expected it to work – it just flowed without judgment or worry. I would say just get out there and travel the world how you want to do it and other like-minded people will come into your life – you never know who that might be ;)

  • Tia

    Inspiring – both of you! I only just found your page from a tweet through Lonely Planet but what an excellent articel!
    My boyfriend and I are in the final planning stages before we buy a yacht and set sail from England for a year to go to europe, south america, caribben… and I think we both had a few inicial worries about the effect on our relationship, but it's great to know that others are sharing the travelling dream and growing together whilst exploring the world!!

    As for your question: For me personally the main change from travelling alone compared to with my partner is that alone, you lack that company to get super excited with about all the amazing things you see and that energy that you work off!

    I'm definately a new blog follower now! Continue to enjoy every moment guys.

  • http://twenty-somethingtravel.com Stephanie

    I really like this post idea. I am currently single and planning my travels solo-like you I have a plan to see the world no matter what! I like solo travel but I would really love to meet someone that I could share that lifestyle with. I think you lucked out- that kind of compatibility seems hard to find!

  • http://chazleydotson.blogspot.com Chazley

    That's a wonderful story! I'm like you — I was determined to travel. Now my husband and I are finishing our second year of teaching abroad and have explored thirteen countries together. I think I would have traveled with or without him, but having someone to share the experience (and to hold the camera) is priceless.

  • http://www.journeyofatravelwriter.com Adam

    I honestly can't even imagine not traveling with my wife. We both loved traveling when we met, and we have taken trips together from the outset of our relationship over 10 years ago. She's the one who actually first suggested a RTW trip, and I completely dismissed her initially. While I loved to travel, I had no clue that this kind of trip was possible for two people who didn't have a ton of money and had no trust funds and weren't straight out of college. Thank God I came to my senses and listened to her because my life has changed immensely since the decision to go on that trip.

    As far as traveling together, we are lucky that we pretty much enjoy doing the same types of things. She likes museums more than I, I like adventure stuff more than she, but we both humor each other enough to make it work. And if I just don't feel like going to another museum, I don't go, and she goes alone, and vice versa with a hike or something like that. It's good to get away from each other every once in a while anyway when traveling for a long time together.

    Certainly my traveling style would be different if I was alone, but there are so many more positives to traveling with my wife that I wouldn't change it for anything. It's funny to hear married friends ask us how we didn't kill each other. I married her because I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her, we love the same things, and we just generally love being together. I kind of feel sorry for married people who don't feel the same way.

  • travelingsavage

    Wow, tough question. I'm sure I wouldn't have been on nearly as many trips if I'd been single the past seven years. Being with Sarah has helped me see how much passion I have for traveling. Now I'm off to travel on my own with Sarah's support for this venture. Interesting times!

  • suzyguese

    What a great question for you guys! It seems like you just found your travel match, which doesn't really compromise your own travel goals and wishes. I have traveled with someone and I can completely relate on becoming more comfortable and daring in the places I will go. When I am alone though, I do feel like I am challenging myself more personally.

  • Sofia_AsWeTravel

    thank you so much Tia – many kind words! :) wow your up-coming trip sounds amazing! look forward to seeing more of you around here and also following your adventure.

  • Sofia_AsWeTravel

    Hey Stephanie – yeah no matter what had happened I would have gone traveling – it's just great to be able to have someone else there to share what I experience – luck maybe ;)

  • Sofia_AsWeTravel

    haha yeah that's a great tip about the camera holding job :p – cool to see others like us traveling together for a long time :)

  • Sofia_AsWeTravel

    WOW Adam – thank you so much for sharing that story – it really sounds very similar to us :) I can only hope we are still doing this 10 years from now – it's been 2 years so far and it's great, so we will see what happens!

  • Sofia_AsWeTravel

    that's really cool that she supports you on your solo travels – any reason why she doesn't join you all the time? work etc.?

  • Sofia_AsWeTravel

    hey Suzy, yeah it was a great question! solo travel does force you to look within yourself more, to become stronger – for us though we push each other so much anyways to be the best we can – so in a way having Nathan around forces me to grow and challenge myself more than if I was alone – he is great like that :p

  • Sofia_AsWeTravel

    thanks Annie – if you have any more Q's about rtw planning, you can just ask :) talk again soon!

  • Sultana

    Very inspring. I think travelling with a partner (one in a relationship with or not) does help to make things more adventurous. Some things you may doubt if you'll b safe doing them alone e.t.c, having someone there sort of gives you the chance to throw caution to the wind…eeer a bit :-)

    Found you through twitter by the way! I put all 'travellers' under one list as this is something that I really want to do in ther near future, so I'd like to learn as much as I can.

    http://unfetteredsultana.wordpress.com

  • travelingsavage

    We're keeping our house and, for the most part, maintaining our old lifestyle so we need cash flow to sustain it. That and Sarah enjoys her job. She also makes jewelry and that isn't the most portable hobby. Ultimately, Traveling Savage is my personal mission and she fully supports it.

  • http://waywardtraveller.com/ Annie

    Just came across this post through your 6 month post but glad I did!

    I am currently abroad in my boyfriend's hometown and this is an adventure for me but I want us to branch out and do some major traveling. Sometimes I question if I'll be giving something up not traveling solo, and he spent a month traveling solo through Oz. Sometimes I feel jealous like he got an experience I didn't. In the end I think it's great to share it with him as long as our dreams stay in tune, if not then we'll know it's time to move on!

    I definitely agree with the added bravery and convenience that come with traveling with a partner! Especially as a female traveler, but then again… I haven't traveled solo yet!

    For now we are planning our saving strategy, followed by our travel strategy!